Yesterday after many months of angst watching my Moms health decline, we moved her into an assisted living. She was like a child in awe of her new surroundings while not quite grasping the situation and her new reality.
The director had asked me to bring her by and hand her off in the afternoon so they could get her acclimated to her new surroundings and it struck me that I was in this situation before.
Not here, not now but over thirty years ago when I dropped my oldest son off on his first day of preschool.
The feelings and fears are so similar! Will they be ok? I hope they don’t get lost! Will they make new friends? Are they afraid?
As I watched Mom go through the doors, she turned and asked, “aren’t you coming?” Trying not to cry, I said not now, but I’ll see you later!” Flashing on the memory of when my son entered school and I bravely waved goodbye then cried my eyes out!
The circle of life is a funny thing. We hold one another tight only to let go for a while. The letting go part isn’t easy but so necessary for life to evolve and for all of us to grow. If we’re lucky, our loved ones will circle back to us, certainly not the same as when they left, but still holding a secure place in our heart.
Today I’m off to see how Mom made out with her first night in her new home. Hopefully, she’ll be as excited as my son was and share all the great things that happened. Or, she could just punch me in the nose for putting her there. We shall see…